Mary Richmond Design

Pink October

As many of you probably know October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month.

Over at Etsy a number of sellers are offering items for sale to celebrate the month and will donate part or all of the proceeds to various breast cancer organizations.

I'm a survivor and for a few months after my diagnosis and treatment I was a member of a wonderful support group. The women in this group were inspirational and phenomenal. They were all in various stages of healing and were willing to share their amazing spirits and help with all the newly diagnosed, frightened women that joined each month. The truth is all breast cancer survivors have a tiny nugget of fear that lives within once they've been diagnosed. Never again is a mammogram routine. Never again is a breast exam casual.

Many doctors and researchers are beginning to feel that breast cancer is a chronic condition, especially in women of a certain age that have been previously diagnosed. And all of us know women who have been diagnosed for a second, even third time. Sometimes these women beat it. Sometimes they don't.

Last week a woman we all knew and loved lost her battle. I don't remember if it was her third or fourth visitation from the disease but this time it had spread far enough and wide enough that even with all her will, spirit and strength it was too much for her.....but she gave it a good, hard battle and everyone who knew her was touched by her good humor, her smile and her hope.

Another friend of mine was told just a week or so before this that her cancer has also returned and is now wreaking havoc throughout her body. She is in the process of taking care of business while undergoing palliative treatment. Her spirit is confident and positive. She says she is actually sort of excited, that she's going to get to find out what's on the other side. In the meantime, she is living, not dying.

The proceeds from the pieces I am adding to my Etsy shop this month will be donated in full to my support group, which in turn makes sure that women in need get rides, turbans, bras, whatever they need without a big fuss being made. I've seen the difference these small kindnesses make and though I'm all for the large organizations that are fighting the good fight out there I am choosing a smaller path with local and intimate connections for me. My donations will be made in the name of our friend that passed away last week.

If you are interested in supporting my efforts or the efforts of all Etsians who have pledged to join in this month of remembrance and donations just log on to www.etsy.com and search for breast cancer, pink october and other similar terms.

You may find my offerings here and here.

Healthy Decisions

Thanks for everybody's comments on my last post. I am feeling much better today!

And here are some of my casual observations....

One person mentioned homeopathy and although this has always intrigued me in theory the two people I know who use homeopathy regularly always seem to have headaches and runny noses.....

Several people I know swear by macrobiotics. One always has a cold of some sort. She always seems to have a runny nose, a sore throat, a headache and chills. Another has achy joints and very bad skin. They also have bad breath and body odor but that may not be because of the diet.....

One friend has suggested acupuncture, which I may try. I've always been curious about this and it seems to have helped her a lot.

At the moment I take no medicines (although I did just take an antibiotic for a bad infection) and would like it to stay that way. I am somewhat hypertensive and seem to have developed this sinus issue so I would like to lose more weight and get my health back in control. My weakness is sugar and breads. I eat lots of fresh veggies, especially dark leafy greens as well as brown rice, tomatoes, blueberries, raw nuts, etc.

Here are my decisions to live by for at least the next 6 weeks to see how it goes.

No sugar, no caffeine, no dairy, no white flour, no red meat, no alcohol, no mushrooms (in case it's candida)

Limited whole wheat flour, poultry, fish, sweet fruits.

Yes to acidopholous, both in yogurt and in pill form.

Meditation twice a day, yoga three times a week (to get me back into it), walk twice a day, resume my morning pages.

Sound like a plan? Feels like a workable plan to me.....wish me luck!

When You Feel Like......

Cr*p.....it's hard to get motivated to do anything except lie around and feel sorry for yourself. I know that some people can break both legs, have 3 chemotherapy treatments in the same day and still be ready to conquer the world, but I am not one of them. I'm not a whiner but I do know when my body is saying, hey Mary, you need to rest....

I woke up on Friday morning with my cheek blown up like a chipmunk's and my teeth and mouth hurt like a son of a gun. There was no way I could go to work. Not only did I just want to lie down but I would have scared the small children.....the look on my husband's and daughter's faces were enough to convince me of that. I think they really didn't know whether to laugh or cry....

I've been having some odd sinus symptoms this summer and it was decided that this was in fact another sinus issue, not a dental issue. I was given a very heavy dosage of an antibiotic and told to rest and drink lots of water.

So of course I've spent the last few days checking out all sorts of info on the internet. Having had two invasive surgeries in the last five years that have left me missing rather important body parts I do not want to go the surgical route that is often recommended for sinus problems. My reading has convinced me that changing my diet and changing some other simple things may be all that is needed.

And so here is the question....how does one know? One diet tackles the idea that the ongoing sinus issue is related to a candida invasion. I don't really think I have the symptoms for this but it's apparently a common cause. The diet to eliminate candida is very intense and strict. Is it necessary?

Other diets dealing with sinus issues are also pretty intense. Has anyone done this?

One thing about using diet to change things going on in your body is that there is so much conflicting info out there. Everything agrees that I should not eat dairy. Well, I've been mostly there anyway. There is much discussion about any and all kinds of wheat flour, yeast, etc. and that's where I'm most hesitant. Not even whole wheat? No gluten. No sugar. No to most fruits. No to many vegetables. Some say no to all meats, poultry and fish.....

I can deal with the dairy, the sugar, the caffeine, the alcohol, the white flour, the red meat....but some of it seems pretty extreme.

Any thoughts? Ideas? Things that have worked or not worked?

I will say the antibiotic, the hot compresses and breathing hot steam spiked with herbs has been helping....and I still look like a chipmunk but a little less like one on steroids, if you know what I mean. My biggest problem right now is dealing with the antibiotic which is wreaking havoc on my innards. I'm allergic to many antibiotics and they end up giving me one that is famous for causing serious and uncomfortable side effects that I have to just hobble through. It does seem to be helping and yes, I'm taking acidopholous several times a day to counteract it....I know some people have issues with antibiotics and I take very few but this infection has been moving around in me for several months now. Hopefully this will help.

And thanks for letting me whine a bit but I figured it was the only way to get help from a wider community out here in blog land..... 

Old Habits Die Hard

It's time for my weekly update as I am now in week three of my sort of detox cleanse dietary change thing. I have successfully given up caffeine and dairy. Well, mostly successfully. I ate a piece of cheese the other day without even thinking about it.

I planned to give up red meat but have had red meat twice. I live with a full bred red meat carnivore and have caved when he fired up the grill....I don't eat a lot of red meat and I've gotten him to eat more fish and chicken as well as many meatless meals so hopefully that is all breaking even somewhere.

Sugar. As you know if you've been reading here, sugar is my darling devil. Love to hate it, hate to love it. Most of the time I do really well. No sugar. And then someone hands me an herbal iced tea and I absent mindedly pour sugar in.....I can resist the cookies, the pies, the cakes and even the ice cream but there's something about a sweet drink on a sticky hot day that just melts my good intentions away. Good to know.

I've continued to lose weight so that's good. We have become serious farmer's market addicts so we have a refrigerator full of fresh, local produce and even local goat cheese to top off a salad. We have never eaten many processed foods or products that use white flour so that part of the equation remains strong.

There are days I kick myself because I haven't followed through 100% but then I remember that my goal is to be and feel healthier, not to revel in guilt and feelings of inadequacy which could easily lead to more sugar.....

I'm feeling lighter and my energy, which is always pretty strong, seems a bit more balanced. Is this true? I have no idea. It's interesting to really look at your eating habits, your ideas around food and your beliefs because I think these more than the actual foods themselves influence our health more than anything.

They say it takes three weeks to change a habit so here I am coming into the home stretch on this one. Next week I add an exercise challenge for myself.

Oh Sugar, Oh Honey, Honey...

Remember that silly song that was around sometime in the seventies? My grown daughters know it too so it suffered some kind of setback but it's in my mind these days....

Last Monday I gave up sugar, caffeine, red meat and dairy....annnnnnnnndddddddddd.....

I've done ok! No caffeine or dairy or red meat but a bit of sugar. ( a lemonade and a popsicle)

I almost died from sugar withdrawal. Seriously, I thought I was having a heart attack or a stroke. Many of the same symptoms....after a few hours when I decided I was probably going to live after all I looked up sugar withdrawal online. There it was, all the awful symptoms I'd been experiencing. I'd cut down to half a cup of coffee a day and have had caffeine headaches when I've quit before but this was unbelievable pain and nausea and palpitations and numbness in my arms and legs. I lived through it.

I can't say I really feel better or different. I've become very aware of how much sweet stuff I was picking at during a day, however. I work at a place where sweets are brought in and put out a lot and as I mentioned before I love my Snapple Iced Tea. I found out Snapple uses high fructose corn syrup so that's out. Trader Joe's lemonade has organic sugar so I went for that the day I just had to have a taste. I figured if I had to cheat it might as well be with organic sugar.

The biggest difference for me has been the dairy. I think I have become lactose intolerant and if this past week is any indication I probably am.

The best part is I lost almost 5 pounds! No granola bars, no sweet drinks, no cream and sugar in coffee. Those were really the only changes I made. I also drank a lot of water. The first week of weight loss is always misleading. My goal now is a pound a week.

And joining a gym. I've decided if I'm really going to be serious about this I need to tone up, too. I hate gyms. Really hate them. So I'm joining the Y and hoping that will be ok. They have a pool and lots of classes, yoga and other things I think I'll like. Why am I joining anything? Because I'm not doing very well doing this alone. I walk every day, occasionally do situps and yoga but it's not enough to do what I need done....I have a lot of weight to lose and it's not going to be pretty if I don't tone up at the same time!

First I need to make it through three more weeks of this sort of half cleanse I'm doing. Then it should be a new habit!

A New Day!

So here I am, the night before my month of detox. For those of you who may wonder why I chose a month, it's because my birthday is early in August and I figure I'd like a little food freedom that day. Maybe I won't but I really can't imagine my birthday without our traditional lobster and clam fest and my mother's recipe for chocolate fudge cake....if there are any doctors reading this, just close your eyes, ok?

I went shopping today and it's amazing to realize how many easy foods, especially beverages that I was buying that don't fit into my new regime. I actually eat pretty well. Lots of fruits and veggies, whole grains, lots of water, lean protein. But I have a wicked sweet tooth and also have been drinking one to two cups of coffee a day after not having any for several years. I snuck some crackers or chips or occasional cookies in my lunch bag, I must admit and I also enjoy a drink after work so that will be a switch, too.

The biggest places I will miss sugar in are in beverages. I have never used artificial sweeteners or used diet drinks (because of the artificial sweeteners) so this will be cold turkey. I use sugar in my coffee, drink iced tea with sugar and like sweet juices and lemondade. I drink lots of water and plain seltzer but every now and then a little sweet goes a long way. I have recently been learning about high fructose corn syrup and want to avoid that, too.

For those who have suggested a more alkaline diet I actually am aware of that and try to utilize many of the foods, etc. that help you stay balanced. And sometimes I go way off it and feel that recently has been one of those times.

As a former breast cancer patient I also avoid most soy products. I know this is a controversial area but for me it just feels right to stay away from them. I have also included dairy in this detox though I will probably continue to have yogurt every few days, both for the calcium and the acidopholus. I understand that our bodies process yogurt differently so am hoping that will be ok for now. I don't think it's great for the alkaline diet but at this point I can only literally follow my gut....

I head off to work very early tomorrow morning so am writing this now. Wish me luck! It will be a morning without coffee, tea or sweet juice! Lunch without cheese and no hamburgers for dinner.

By the way, for our cookout I made marinated chicken (homemade, simple and healthy marinade), fresh green salad, fresh whole grain bread, fresh cole slaw and an orzo salad with fresh herbs from my garden...pretty healthy cookout food and the whole family loved it!

Remembering Jeanne

I met Jeanne in the spring of 1989 when she was the only one who showed up for an outdoor painting class I had advertised. I had called her that morning, pointing out that it was pouring rain out but we could paint a garden from a porch if that was all right. "Hell, ya!" she said.

She showed up in her bright yellow rain coat, red wellies and a pink and purple turban. It didn't take long to find out she was in the midst of chemotherapy treatments for breast cancer. "But I'm fine," she said with a big smile.

Over the summer she was in my painting classes twice a week. We painted all over Cape Cod in all sorts of weather and with all sorts of people. We talked about everything. She was old enough to be my mother but that didn't bother either one of us. We became fast friends and as the classes went on we added to our entourage. Our favorite companion was a 21 year old Irish girl named Aine who was studying to be a doctor but wanted to be an artist. She had one summer in the states before going back to Dublin and she was determined to do as much painting as she could.

The three of us laughed and painted and drank enough tea and coffee to float many boats. We knew where every public restroom on Cape Cod was by the time fall had rolled around. Aine returned to Ireland and other students wimped out when the weather turned cold but Jeanne and I painted from the car when we had to and found lots of protected places that allowed us to paint outdoors, even in January. It was January when Jeanne found out her cancer was back to stay.

By April we were painting daffodils in one of our favorite gardens and by May we were back at our favorite view at Fort Hill in Eastham. By mid May she was too tired to go out painting and by the end of June it was over.

I can't even begin to tell you the lessons I learned from this amazing brave, creative and inspiring woman. She was so smart and so funny that she could make you laugh about just about anything, including cancer. She was insightful and forgiving, honest and accepting. She lived her life fully right up to the last few days when she finally lay down and went to sleep surrounded by her loving family.

I never thought I'd get breast cancer when I was hanging around with Jeanne painting and laughing and eating lunch sitting on the hood of my car overlooking the ocean. It didn't run in my family like it did in hers. I listened to her concern for her daughters but neither of us really considered I would some day be at risk.

My cancer was caught early and I was able to escape with minimal treatment, for now anyway. One thing I've learned about breast cancer is that once you have it most doctors now consider it a chronic disease. Will it come back and get me? I can't worry about it too much. If I learned anything from my friend Jeanne it was to get out there and do what you want to do. Don't accept second best. Go for the best, in yourself, in your work, in your personal life, everywhere. Don't put off anything. Every day is new. Every day is the best we've got to work with right now.

Love you, Jeanne--and thanks for everything!

What's your story?

Breast Cancer Affects All of Us

Before I go too far in listing the links and the folks and organizations that donate or raise money for breast cancer research I would like to invite you to write about someone you know who has been touched by breast cancer. It can be you, it can be a friend or family member, anyone. You may write your story in a comment but I am thinking it would be awesome for all of us to write a story on our blogs and link to each others stories. Imagine this web, this network of stories going around the world in cyberspace. I would like to keep a positive spin and make hope our theme but tell your stories in whatever way feels most natural. Please leave a link to your post in the comment section. I will add my own story later today.

Eventually breast cancer will affect you whether it's through a friend, your mother, your sister, your neighbor, your child's teacher or yourself. This is a chance to tell about those people in your life who have been touched or how you have been touched.

What's your story? And thanks for taking the time to share.

Blogging to Benefit Breast Cancer Research

This week I'm going to blog about how we as artists and craftspeople can raise awareness and money for breast cancer research. Much of the money raised for breast cancer goes to looking for a cure, not the causes and I would like to raise money to be donated for more research on the causes of breast cancer.

Most women diagnosed with breast cancer today will not die from breast cancer. Some will have surprisingly little treatment and move on, others will have a lot of treatment but will also be able to move on with the rest of their lives. Some will do everything they can and will lose the battle. At the moment of diagnosis I think every woman wonders which she will be and worries that she will be in the group that doesn't make it.

As a woman who was diagnosed with breast cancer about a year and half ago I am one of the lucky ones. I had a very beginning stage and a mastectomy was the only treatment I needed.

Today I finally went and got my prosthesis.

I've been thinking about this a lot this week. What took me so long? I can give you all sorts of answers but the truth is I was just ready now. I've had a temporary sort of thing ever since my surgery but it made me look sort of lopsided and I think I sort of thought, hey, this is what breast cancer and a mastectomy do.....they make you lopsided, they rip your body apart. And today I'm excited. I look normal again! And it took less than half an hour!

There are lots of people on Etsy donating money for breast cancer and in the next few days I will be linking to their sites as well as putting up some of my own drawings and prints to benefit breast cancer research so please stay tuned!

Have any of you run a benefit in your Etsy Shop or through your blog? I'd love to hear your stories.

Visualize Health!

Here is my health collage! It is 18 x 24" and will be my new screen saver on my computer as well as on the studio wall.

I love the process of making these collages. When I first got sick with the "ick" this week I bought a bunch of health magazines, knowing I might do this project so I had lots of good images and words to use. I also enjoyed reading the magazines to jumpstart my new healthy lifestyle.

The top picture is a close up of the center. I love the picture of the woman on the breast cancer walk and as a survivor I thought a central place on the collage was a good start.

My process on these collages is to just go through a bunch of magazines choosing images and words that appeal to me. I don't think about it too much or analyze it at all. I let it be pretty intuitive. If you look at the images I chose you'll see a few themes emerging.

One of my favorite images in this one is the couple dancing. My husband doesn't dance. He says he hates to dance so for about 30 years I have not danced......I thought maybe, just maybe if I put the picture up......

After my bout with cancer I found myself totally attracted to butterflies. I have since found out that the butterfly is used as a symbol for cancer patients, especially breast cancer patients. Funny how your gut just picks up on these things.

I had a lot of fun doing this collage. If any of you make one, please let me know and I'll post a link here!

I'm a huge fan of visualization. This stuff works! Please share your own stories.

This last one is not such a clear photo but gives you an idea of the whole piece.